I Went Back To Church Today

  I am happy to meet with my friends in their home - or the park or the ice cream shop - a couple of times a month and call it church.  I feel that my life is in pretty good balance with that level of involvement in spiritual gatherings.

  But today my wife and I took advantage of an opportunity to attend "regular church" with some of our family.  We went to a large suburban Baptist church where the music was trendy and loud, the atmosphere was informal, and the preaching was positive and encouraging.

  And I had a good time.  It was a positive experience for me, which is really saying something, because the first few times I visited a church after my traumatic exit from my local parish, the experience made me sick to my stomach.  Really.

  

  If you have read more than a couple of my blog posts you are aware that I am a critic of conservative evangelical institutions in America.  I think that much of what happens there is way off the mark of what God had in mind for his Body of believers.  You could probably randomly click on any selection in the left sidebar of this blog page and get an eyeful of my candid truth-telling assessment of denominational religion, based on my understanding of the New Testament.

  But today I saw the other side, the side that I haven't focused on much, the side that is not offensive to the culture and not offensive to the scriptures and most importantly, not offensive to Jesus.

  If you decide to go back to church, I suggest you look for a place like this:

• The atmosphere is relaxed and friendly, but not in-your-face welcoming.  They leave you alone to be a non-participating spectator if you want.  Nobody makes you raise your hands or say "Amen".  The apparel is a mix of faded jeans and 3-piece suits as if nobody really cares what you wear - or whether you have tattoos or body piercings, for that matter.  Nobody asks you to remove your hat if you wear one inside.  Little kids run back and forth and nobody stops them and scolds them about their irreverence for "God's temple."
• A church that respects the US constitution and its provision for the separation of church and state.  There is no mention of politics or the government, no alarmist warning about liberal politicians or the ubiquitous slippery slope.  No hyped-up challenge to somehow "take back America for God" (the "how-to" is always absent).
• There is no haranguing about giving.  Tithing is not forced, you are free to give or not to give without any expectation either way.  Finances seem to be handled responsibly and without a lot of waste.
• The property is modest and practical and is used efficiently by scheduling the same facilities for several different activities during the week (the church that I attended today has 1 worship service on Saturday night and 3 on Sunday morning and a variety of other venues during the week). Even better if the building is open to the public for walking and exercise, dance or karate classes, family reunions and other community events.  Stretch your donated dollar by using the resources as much as possible.
• The sermon is presented in a friendly and non-condemning manner.  It is not a dissertation on scriptural doctrine or denominational dogma, but rather a simple explanation of a spiritual idea leading to a practical application that is easily applied to the listener's everyday life.  It is grace-filled.
• The presenter is humble and an ordinary guy (or lady) who does not come off looking superior to the others in the room.  Even if he has an education and a divinity degree, his sermon is not grandiloquent or complicated.  The truths are not empowered by shouting or finger-pointing.  People do not leave the room feeling belittled or humiliated but rather encouraged.
• There are home groups or smaller venues that are conducive to discussion where you can ask questions.
• The essential hierarchy is invisible to the constituents.  Leaders don't seem to be in competition with each other or with the neighboring churches.

  Let me be clear about something:  The personality and demeanor of the pastor will make or break a church.  If he/she is mean and vindictive and uses the Bible as a weapon of mass destruction, there will be an abusive and toxic environment.  If you have experienced this at your local assembly, if you leave the meetings feeling a sense of condemnation, you should get yourself free immediately.

  On the other hand, if the leader is humble and grace-filled and magnanimous and servant-like, there will be health and spiritual vitality, and he will automatically be endowed with spiritual authority, much like Christ.  This is a good person to be around and from whom to receive spiritual food.

  Some of my acquaintances have said of me that I was "burned by the church".  Not so.  The church is made up of people.  I was burned by people.  People who had been my friends for decades, placed a higher value on the institution than they did on their relationship with me and with other individuals.  

  People are what's right with the church, and people are what's wrong with the church.

  There are at least two things about people that make them good or bad for the church:  One is bad doctrines that they believe and which govern their actions.  Bad doctrine can make good people do bad things.  The legalistic practice of the "submission to authority in the church" orthodoxy is an example of a bad doctrine that enables thousands of well-intentioned leaders to inadvertently construct environments of abuse and oppression.

  The other is bad character.  There are some people who simply should not lead others, because they have issues themselves that cause them to seek power and to dominate others.

  Add bad character to bad doctrine and you have a recipe for disaster (domineering men empowered by the doctrine of "submission to authority" wreak havoc throughout the Christian world).  Sadly, this is the norm in a lot of places.

  Fortunately, the church that I visited today was not like this.  It is led by a very intelligent but very down-to-earth young man who has a winsome personality and whose default interaction with people of all kinds is to declare their great worth by building them up and encouraging them, both through the fixtures of the local church and by his own respect for them as individuals.  He does not use the Bible as a bludgeon.

Ernesto Alaniz of Faith Baptist

  He was educated at Moody Bible College in Chicago, he is a big, lovable Tex-Mex-American named Ernesto Alaniz, and he is my son-in-law.  He is the campus pastor at Faith Baptist Church in Waterford, Michigan.

  If you want to go back to church, you should look for a non-condemning place like Faith Baptist that is led by an unassuming servant-type guy like Ernesto.  You should be safe there.

  Also, this is an independent church with no denominational alliances that can precipitate bad dictates from powerful characters in ivory towers.  Remember, power tends to corrupt.

   One other thing.  Pastors aren't the only ones who can set a poisonous tone in a local church.  The last four churches that have blown up in my neighborhood over the last four years were taken over by one or two power brokers, usually sitting on a governing board, who simply didn't like the pastor or the direction he was taking the church.  In most of these cases the district leaders caved in and sided with the dissidents, eventually ousting the pastors.  Hey, these folks are usually the ones holding the purse strings, like Judas, so the denominational leaders have little choice but to let them prevail ("If I don't get my way, I'll withhold my tithe or leave the church").  District leaders' livelihoods are dependent on the flow of funds from the local churches, so money steers logistics.

  There's good and there's bad in everything.  Seek a place with an abundance of good.  Good people and good practices.  Look for grace, love and respect.  If you don't see it in the leaders, don't go near the place.